I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
