Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
