can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
