I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night�
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
