I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
