So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize