i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize
