ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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