i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
