My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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