Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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