Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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