You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
