we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
