i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
