hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
COCAINE IS GR8
Randomize
