Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Panties = found
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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