this just has baby written all over it
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I AM VODKA MAN
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
