Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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