so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize