hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Shame is for Republicans.
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