Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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