If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
