Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Randomize
