i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
