I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
