a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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