Jerry, you need to find god
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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