I'm lost and stupid without you.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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