dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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