Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
