I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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