Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
