What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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