I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
now i know why i became what i already was.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
