Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(816): View more from Missouri

You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.

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(516): View more from New York

i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups

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(507): View more from Minnesota

I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...

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(703): View more from Virginia

I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.

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(972): View more from Texas

In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.

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