I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
