Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
