that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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