Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
