I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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