Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
she told me i tasted like america
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
