she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
