we're blogging at a bar
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
