You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
