Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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