the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
