best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I touched a dick in church today
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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