Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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