Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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